February 04, 2005

Filthy Lie: Evil Glenn's Garbage

Harvey, over at the Alliance HQ was wondering the other day; just what would one find if one sifted through Evil Glenn’s garbage?

By purest happenstance, I had in my possession a sample of said trash. (The law states that once trash hits the curb, it is public domain… besides, you wouldn’t believe the stuff you can sell on e-bay.) This sample hadn’t yet been put up for auction, so I will share the contents with you.

Evil Glenn Trash Bag Inventory

1 carton eggs, empty
12 ziplock bags containing egg yolks
12 ziplock bags containing egg whites
4 boxes instant cake mix, empty (with the words “separate 3 eggs and fold into batter” highlighted)
- I wonder if he used the shells…
4 Sammy Sosa bobblehead dolls, broken, and covered in eggshell fragments
- I guess he did.

15 cartons Pall Mall cigarettes, unopened yet singed
1 letter, “R” (a 6 inch cardboard cutout, colored blue)
1 legal flier with “If you have smoked Pall Mall cigarettes, please send us a letter so that we may represent you in a class action lawsuit.” Highlighted
1 scrap of paper with “Oops, I think I may have misinterpreted this… have to check with the boys at the law firm.” stapled to the legal flier

1 computer mouse, crushed in a rat-trap
- I guess the Insta-Wife is trying to cut down on his computer time
1 computer keyboard, broken, with what looks like hair and blood imbedded in the keys
- I guess he didn’t take the hint…

That’s all that was in that bag. All of the other ones from that trash pickup were already sorted and put on e-bay. So if you want to see more, you’ll have to bid. :-)

(That is all)

Posted by GEBIV at February 4, 2005 07:39 PM
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