October 07, 2005

Fithly Lie: Evil Glenn's Cruise Line

Well, I guess the impending Wisconsin winter (I belive it begins the day after Columbus Day) is weighing heavily on Harvey, because he seems to be actually contemplating a cruise on Evil Glenn's newest acquisition, Princess Cruise Lines.

I don't have any personal information on what happens on a cruise, (I haven't had a vacation in several years) but I have heard some rumors on what to expect from Captain Glenn.

First of all, when they say it's a southern cruise, they mean SOUTHERN. As in South Pole. That's right, the cruise line is being entirely converted into penguin sighting trips.

Or should I say, penguin spying trips. About half of the current state-rooms on the cruise ships are being re-fitted to contain massive volumes of high-speed video cameras with extremely powerful telephoto lenses. The on board movie theaters will be playing the newly acquired footage on a continual basis.

The only other thing I heard about the reconfigured cruise line (as if the penguins weren't bad enough) is that whatever you do, you don't want to tell Captain Glenn that you are retired. As far as he's concerned, retirement is just a bad haircut away from being a hobo. And even though he usually leaves his hobo-whacking bat at home, those shuffleboard sticks make a pretty good substitute.

Posted by GEBIV at October 7, 2005 08:36 PM | TrackBack

Well, shuffleboard itself qualifies as "evil" :-)

Posted by: Harvey at October 9, 2005 05:24 PM
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