October 12, 2005

PGHA: Ramadan

This week at The Alliance, Harvey wanted us to play nice and come up with some ways to help the Islamo-fascist-terrorist-scum (Oops, sorry about that, let's just call them tangos. You know, the phonetic word for "T" which stands for terrorist. 'Sides it sounds like mangoes, and everyone likes mangoes.) tangos celebrate Ramadan.

Well, I don't know much about Islamic holidays, but I seemed to remember reading somewhere that Ramadan was one of those fast holidays. Not fast as in it goes by quickly, like Christmas to a little kid. But fast as in you aren't allowed to eat anything. From what I understand, this is strictly observed during the daylight hours, and then at night, you can feast like a... well, certainly not some sort of porcine farm animal, but you get the general drift.

Now, all these *ahem* tangos claim to be the most religious and strictest adherents to the Islamic faith. So the way I figure to help them celebrate Ramadan better, is to encourage them to go whole ho- er, not take any half measures. None of this only during the day stuff. Remember, the sun is always shining somewhere.

So if you're a tango celebrating Ramadan, don't just not eat during the day. Don't eat at all for the entire month! And then, if you want to show how much better you are than all the other tangos who are merely fasting by not eating, don't drink any water or any other liquids either. That'll show them who's the most religious little tango.

And then, for the final tie breaker, you can give up breathing for Ramadan too. Oxygen is just a crutch for the weak anyways.

Remember, if you're a tango out there who want's help celebrating Ramadan, just let us at The Alliance know. I'm sure that everyone will be glad to help you with my suggestions.

Posted by GEBIV at October 12, 2005 07:23 PM | TrackBack

Oxygen IS practically food.

You're right. They SHOULD forego it :-)

Posted by: Harvey at October 15, 2005 06:21 PM
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