August 09, 2006

PGHA: Raul's first 100 days

Here in America, a President is often rated by his first 100 days in office. (Usually because this is about as long as the Congress will let them accomplish anything...) Well, even though Raul Castro probably won't make the full 100 days as president of Cuba (either Fidel will recover by then or Raul will 'get sick' too...) Harvey would like to know: What changes will Raul Castro make in Cuba during his tenure as President?

#1) The Official State Facial Hair will be changed from "Hedge Beard" to "Cheesy Mustache".

#2) All the monogram towels in all of the presidential palaces will be changed from "F C" to "R C". (And it'll only take adding two little lines to the "F"! Brilliant!)

#3) Havana will be renamed Big Mac!

#4) All Cuban money will have a "Scratch-n-Sniff" sticker of Raul pasted over Fidel's picture. (You don't want to know what flavor.)

#5) Big Mac will be renamed Raultown. (That's what you get when you use a place mat from McDonalds to send out your city re-naming proclamations...)

#6) The entire treasury of Cuba (about $532) will be spent on Mega-Millions Lottery tickets. 'Cause hey, you never know!

#7) And finally, "¡Vivo la revolución!" (Long live the revolution!) will be replaced with "Tipo. ¿Dónde está mi hermano?" (Dude. Where's my brother? ) as the Official State Slogan.

Posted by GEBIV at August 9, 2006 09:12 PM | TrackBack

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